Beetroot Smoothie

BEETROOT SMOOTHIE.....hmmm

So we moved in about 3 months ago now and the people we bought the house from were nice enough to leave some of the fruit and veg they had grown in the garden.  Unfortunately we don't have much experience with whole fruits and vegetables, and we haven't been very adventurous in the past.  Now after recent issues, is the time to get healthy quick the natural way In Sha Allah.

Beetroots have a high level of iron and other essential vitamins and minerals such as vitamin K vitamin C are among a few.

Now what about the leaves? If the root is edible the leaves might be too right?  After a bit of googling I came across this recipe.

1) One banana,

2) a bunch of beetroot leaves chopped

3) a glass of water

4) some honey to taste.

The result :

Colour of the earth.

Now since this is the first time we have tried this it may just be because the leaves are quite tough and old maybe with baby beetroot leaves it would taste quite nice.  This however tasted like a combination of earth and flowers rolled into one.

I guess I would prefer to pop a pill than have this on a regular occasion.  Next trial will be a beets leaf soup.

Bayyinah TV

After listening to a recent Bayyinah clip.  Usthadah Nouman suggested we should each year aim to have developed a further understanding with the quran.  Since ma'Sha Allah new content is being put on the channel and I'm falling further and further behind, I decided that this year I will dedicate to complete the Quran Cover to cover series.  I am currently on surah al Baqara ayat 118 So a long way to go.  I would love to find a partner to help with this project.  Its a shame I can't get the children involved but at their pace things would move to slowly.  So In Sha Allah maybe during car journeys the aim is to share little gems with them that will help them connect with the Quran , and then maybe complete Juz amma with them.

http://www.bayyinah.tv/sp/9942-bayyinah-tv join me in this journey today.

Trials and Tribulations of a miscarriage.

Today I want to discuss the story of a friend.  This friend is very close to me and her story is a reminder of how short our lives are:

So the news the you have been waiting for is here;  that thin second line indicating a positive result on the pregnancy test, the moment the rest of your life is about to change.  A new life will In Sha Allah be entering into your life. Congratulations! Allah has blessed you with carrying a child In Sha Allah.   You are filled with all different emotions, happiness and joy, fear of the unknown, wondering if you'll be able to cope.  At different points of your life you may even think of the unthinkable, do I even want this child?

Then if your blessed you sail through nine months of pregnancy without any difficulty.  If Allah wishes to test you you may suffer various ailments, all of which will make you appreciate your health and that glass of water you once took for granted, you may now wish you could give up your wealth just to be able to drink that glass of ice cold fresh rehydrating water, instead you decide to pack a bottle into your hospital bag as your treat for having a baby.

Then you may go off your once favourite foods, for those who know me know that I am a chocolate addict..lol well it is delicious after all.  Subhanallah during pregnancy all the things I used to love seemed to suddenly be the worse thing on the planet.  Chocolate oh no thank you.  Coffee you said? where is the nearest toilet? Ice lollies....yummy, coke oh yes please but with half a bucket of ice please, no I'm not about to give birth on your plane I'm only 22 weeks just give me some ICE for God's sake. Salt and vinegar crisps yes please, oh no wait istigfurallah yuck! please can I have ready salted, u know what, forget it I suddenly really don't like crisps.

You start to plan what maternity clothes you'll buy what style are you planning on wearing.  Do you want to show off your bump or cloak it and surprise people with a baby at the end of the 9 months.  That's always fun to see peoples faces...haha. first week you get funny looks but by the second week, people click that something is a bit more permanent...lol.

People will suddenly be interested in every detail, was it planned? I bet you want a boy/girl.  How about twin boys then you will increase your husbands name.  Your husband and your mother in law will be happy.  The world will not look down on you for only having girls.  Your girls will no longer have to share the family's inheritance. A son someone who will look after you and his sisters in old age.  The fact that his wife may steal him away we won't think about that now.

One day your life is turned around, something happens, you start to realise that what is happening isn't right. You've not felt right, you've been pregnant before and it was never like this.  Morning sickness ok even all day sickness, but I feel like i've been hit by a bus, I feel so dizzy, and what is happening to me. People start giving you stupid advice to make you feel better I bet if your pregnancy is different it has to be a boy, because so and so had those symptoms and it was a boy.  As if they suddenly have knowledge of the unseen.  I'm sure people mean well.

So you arrange  an emergency scan only to be told "I'm sorry dear but its not good news".  It looks like your baby either never developed or it died early on and your signs that you are showing is your body getting ready to get rid of your baby.  So you get dressed wait for your report and go back to report to the midwife.  You have to sit there pretending you have no clue what the scan said, what is meant to happen next, be told by the "medical team" what the ideal method of evacuating your unborn child, with what feels to be no concern about how you feel.  You want me to wait another week feeling like this?  Yes because its illegal to do anything now.  But there is no baby! Nothing I'm not a naive teenager that is confused I couldn't have made up 6 weeks of morning sickness! The baby is not coming back.  Oh Allah please forgive me I know you are capable of anything but you wouldn't tease me.  If you wanted me to have this child you would make it disappear and then reappear.

We start trying to understand the Fiqh, since this is a baby with no soul its not nafas, it's not menstruation either because something was there.  It's istihadah! Allah swt wants to keep you connected to Him during this time, He wants you to know that it is from Him all good and only He will get you through this.  You seek refuge in salat and patience and He advised.

Then you over hear the doctors discuss your case another number in the long book failed pregnancies another number to add to the millions already.  But I've had enough I cry, morning sickness and a baby I understand but feeling this ill and nothing to show at the end of it.  To top it off I now have to go back and tell all the people I have lost the baby.  I've spent 6 weeks being antisocial, not eating at peoples houses looking like I am stuck up, waiting to hear peoples response most disappointment pity, many care, but some that want to throw every bad word or complaint you ever made.  Anything you do say can and will be used in evidence against you.  You suddenly become the most evil person in front of Allah in peoples eyes.  If you hadn't considered getting rid of it, if you hadn't complained about the sickness.  You clearly could not have coped if you had the baby so Allah took it away.  Next time you have to be more organised more grateful to Allah swt.  You now not only have your own negative thoughts in your head but those comments that are only hurtful and of no benefit at this time.

Really? If the words I utter in a moment of despair are going to come down with such a harsh punishment, I may as well give  up now, because my destination is surely Hell Fire, Allah will soon test me with my children who are alive, and with everything I have because by complaining and not being super organised and tidy, and haven't been able to bring up the most perfect children,  What is the point of trying?

Inside you for what you thought was 11 weeks down the line of a beautiful healthy pious child was nothing but a lump of flesh that reacted badly with your body, weakened you, and put you through one of the hardest trials known to human beings.  Being tested with your child.  Now I understand that loosing a child in the first few weeks of pregnancy is nothing like the pain of loosing one further down the line having to give birth to a dead child is one of my worse nightmares, and may Allah Swt never test me further than this with my children.  I truly believe that if this continued there must have been something bad with it.  Either the child wasn't healthy or would have caused me problems or have hurt my health further.

You have a week of waiting, to see if your body rejects the baby itself or whether you need to undergo treatment, the longer you wait the harder the feeling, the greater the risks to your health.
A lump of flesh that creates after pains greater than that after delivery, Subhanallah.  Oh Allah grant my pain as an eraser of my sins, and a means of getting closer to You.


The positives that have come out of this pregnancy are numerous.

1) Reminded me the blessing of health,
2) The blessing of my beautiful healthy children and may Allah swt protect them and grant me the ability to be the best mother I can be to them.
3)It brought back memories of the last 9 months that I could not drink a glass of water and how blessed we are to be able to drink fresh water from the tap.
4) the blessing and positive reminders are plenty probably far more than my mind can understand.
5) To learn who is a positive influence in my life and who is a negative influence.

Allah swt is such a mericiful Lord:
 Narrated 'Aisha: (the wife of the Prophet) Allah's Apostle said, "No calamity befalls a Muslim but that Allah expiates some of his sins because of it, even though it were the prick he receives from a thorn." 

Narrated Abu Huraira: Allah's Apostle said, "The example of a believer is that of a fresh tender plant; from whatever direction the wind comes, it bends it, but when the wind becomes quiet, it becomes straight again. Similarly, a believer is afflicted with calamities (but he remains patient till Allah removes his difficulties.) And an impious wicked person is like a pine tree which keeps hard and straight till Allah cuts (breaks) it down when He wishes." (See Hadith No. 558, Vol. 9.)  

Narrated Abu Huraira: Allah's Apostle said, "If Allah wants to do good to somebody, He afflicts him with trials."  

All the above are Sahih Bukhari,

None of them mention a calamity that is from Allah is a punishment?  

إِنَّا للهِ وَإِنَّـا إِلَيْهِ رَاجِعونَ‎

Verily we belong to Allah and to Allah we will return.  

When a few close friends told me this.  It took me a while to understand this.  Not the ayat I understand everything belongs to Allah, but they told me there was nothing? How do you grieve nothing? But then it clicked.  Everything is for Allah even the hope and plans we have belong to Allah who is the only One who can grant us things.  We belong to Allah, so surely even this lump of flesh that was promised was never mine to begin with. In Order to achieve true reward we must be patient at the time of calamity, But we also have to believe that Allah swt knows what is right for us and that Allah swt will reward us that this pain will have its reward only from Allah, Allah is the best of planners.  

One thing this has taught me is that even the people closest to you will hurt you.  They will always remember the bad that has happened they will always remind of you of what things you said.  

Only complain to Allah and have friends that will remind you of Allah. You need people who lift you in life not people who will put you down when you're already down. 

Alhamdullah for everything.
Oh Allah allow me to be continually grateful for the blessings You have bestowed upon me.  Grant me a clean and kind tongue and do not allow me to hurt others with it. 

Every day Struggles

So you wake up wanting to change the world, then a few minutes in and you realise you can't change yourself not alone your household.  Things can feel very depressing, but what needs to be done is small but consistent changes.

The Prophet ﷺ said, “The most beloved of deeds to Allah are those that are most consistent, even if it is small”. [Collected by Bukhaari and Muslim]

By adding small changes into your life and trying to continually stick to them and develop them into your habit can not only change you but change those around you.  


Split our lives into parts.  

1. Body
2. Soul
3. Home

BODY

Without strength we are no good to ourselves nor to our families, increase in your fitness regime, start by making sure you take extra steps in your day build on your goal, whether that is walking up a few extra flights of stairs or a few 1000 steps.  Walk with a buddy, that way you encourage each other and you don't realise how much your doing.  Invest in something that will encourage you whether thats a diary to make a note or scales to check your weight, or a podometer.  By encouraging yourself and others you improve many aspects of your life.

Will I hit my 10000 step target today?

Water 

We all know we should be drinking more but how many of us actually hit our target.  By drinking more water not only are we ensuring our digestive system works well but our skin and general health improves, you will feel more energetic, maybe its all those trips to the bathroom :)

Will I hit my 1.5L water target?
SOUL

And I did not create the jinn and mankind except to worship Me. 51:56

We must not forget that this is our main purpose in life.  This does not mean that everything else is haram.  By changing our intention to always associate everything with Allah we are making our activities change from being actives to worship.  So when going for a walk, Ask Allah swt to bless the walk so that it will be a source of His pleasure.  By walking you are appreciating Allah's creation, you are strengthening your body to improve your worship, and it maybe a chance to do indirect dawn.

Will I make time to read some Quran and pray extra salats?

Home

We all have homes and other things to do make sure our existence, whether that is household chores, studying working.  All these need to be done, and done to our utmost ability.  By asking Allah swt tawfeeq in all these matters again we are gain His pleasure.  Simple things again such as whilst you are cooking, you are aware you are cooking a halal meal, you are producing a healthy meal to feed you or your family in a way that will allow them to have productive lives in the way of Allah.

Raising tomorrows leaders

Raising the Leaders of Tomorrow Mufti Ismail Menk

http://soundcloud.com/mudeer-menk

This is amazing lecture that I recommend everyone who has children or is involved in the bringing up of children should listen to.


My reflections from the lecture:

Every year problems are greater. I really relate to this because when I was younger the internet was dial up there were no mobile phones unless you were rich.
As much as the world is being technological advanced leadership and attitudes are becoming backward.
May Allah swt make us leaders and us recognise leaders:

We can't have everything sometimes in order for good leadership we sometimes need to give up our opinions.

The Quran, Sunnah and the Sahaba are our examples.
We have examples how the Prophet Muhammad peace and blessing be upon him how he treated his own children and the children of the ummah.

Virtue of an orphan child.  A child that before the age of puberty who doesn't have father is an orphan.
There is a a lesson in this for leadership.  Leadership is not restricted to those who have both parents. A perfect condition for children is to have both parents but not a must look at the Prophet PBUH.

Islam is for everyone not just muslims:
 

Mufti Menk's Twenty Point Plan

1. Praise your child in the presence of others and any child you want to raise to be a leader,
Mashallah you've done well you look good.

Even if they get 4 out of 10 in an exam why do you want to concentrate on the 6 that were wrong look at the 4 that was right....subhanallah

When you praise your child in front of others you naturally put in that leadership quality by making them feel loved and appreciated.
next time you can add things i.e. next time you will do even better...

If yout want to admonish your child do it only in private.
Otherwise it's self destructive and the child you decrease self confidence.
Loose the confidence of the child because of this in the presence of others.

The child's job is to cry your job is to handle the child correctly!
slapping your child and telling them to shut up????????
To say keep quiet is a much better quality, this is a much a higher word.  SHUT UP shows your own fustration and you don't have respect for your child therefore how can your child have respect for others.


2.Never make your child feel that they are useless.
It is broader and far greater than above. They are taught that some are more deserving than others when you favour one over others.
Give all the children or none of them don't only buy things for one.
There is always hope and Allah says this in the Quran, a person who feels that they have commmited a sin and will never be forgiven by Allah has followed the footsteps of the devil.

3. Every time we speak to our children talk with respect.
Please and thank yous'.

Speak with language that is not colloquial. Clear concise, they will speak to others in that matter.  Speak with manners and respect and your child will follow your footsteps.
Do not even tell off the children infront of other siblings.
The prophet subhanallah said do not speak slang it will reduce your respect.

4. When your child is young remember they are children!
Correct expectations. Do not treat them like adults.
Let them do something that is fitting to that age they need time to play.
you will not spoil them for giving them what they need as children.
Treat them within their ages groups.
Carry them when they're young. :)
Otherwise a child rebels at an early age.  When they are adults they try and become to the child they never were.

5. Assist the child to make decisions.
Help the child.  Speak to them appreciate what they have chosen if it is not wrong, we need to guide and help them, give them advice.
They will later be able to make decisions and help others make decisions.

6. When your making decisions, ask their opinions.
shura teach children consultation.
Mutual disscusion to make decisions.

7. Give each child their own section of the house.
A room, a corner hang up their achievements

8, Lead by example

Pray
start instructing your children to pray from the age of 7

10. Encourage your children to ask questions.
children know too much two young.
talk about marriage at the age of the 10.

11. always fulfil your promises.

12. devolop the skills of being part of a group
team effort is very important when part of a group.
competition is important within certain limits.
team sports you can only win if you pass things to others give them a chance.

Make Duaa for you children.
In battle sometimes the prophet gave leadership to people who were not best in war.

13. Relate to your children stories of when you were young.

14. teach your child to say no to things that are unacceptable.

15.

16. how to rise up to failure.  How to react to failure.

17. when you have made an error to your child admit fault! say I'm sorry
becareful if you wont admit your wrong you'll get to a point where you wont admit your errors to Allah

18. Have suprises for your children.  Every so often, it boosts their deeds of goodness.  helps kids excell.

19.Train our children to read a portion of the Quran daily.
The minute you see they get bored stop and continue tomorrow.
read material that is good. and question the material teach them how to know if it's good.

20.Tell the child repeated that you love your child.
they are the most important to you.
Hug and embrace them.
It is sunnah to kiss your children.